Dating Checklist: Questions to Ask Yourself Before Falling In Love Again
Men and women often focus on the wrong questions when choosing their partners.
Good relationships start with good decisions, and evaluating your beliefs about relationships and love before you start a relationship is the most important thing you can do. You must be sure that your expectations are realistic in order to have a happy and functional long-term relationship, and I’m including a quick cheat-sheet below you can use to do a little self-exploration in the romance department. I pulled these questions from a checklist in my book, Overcome Relationship Repetition Syndrome, where I include three entire chapters to hands-on checklists and inventories about your love life. With each question, I also share my advice!
What are the three most important characteristics to look for in a partner?
Men and women have the hardest time with this issue, as they’re usually too focused on sex appeal and personality ‘sparks,’ and focusing too little on the factors that actually matter the most. Simply put, the most important characteristics are kindness, reliability, and emotional stability. If you’re lucky enough to be spend much of your life with someone who has those qualities, you are going to have years of happiness and peace ahead of you.
What are the three most important characteristics to look for in a partner?
Men and women have the hardest time with this issue, as they’re usually too focused on sex appeal and personality ‘sparks,’ and focusing too little on the factors that actually matter the most. Simply put, the most important characteristics are kindness, reliability, and emotional stability. If you’re lucky enough to be spend much of your life with someone who has those qualities, you are going to have years of happiness and peace ahead of you.
What is the primary purpose of a romantic relationship?
It took many years of studying psychology and working with clients to get to the bottom of this one. When we’re young, we believe that the purpose of a romantic relationship is to provide you with an ultimate family: first a partner, then kids. But the purpose of a romantic relationship isn’t about procreation, necessarily. Actually, the purpose of a romantic union is to provide support and bring out the best in each other, so that each individual has the nourishment and strength to go out in the world and reach the life goals that each individual has. Meanwhile, in bad relationships, the relationships actually drain both partners and hold them back from what they could otherwise be doing to advance themselves and to keep evolving as individuals.
It took many years of studying psychology and working with clients to get to the bottom of this one. When we’re young, we believe that the purpose of a romantic relationship is to provide you with an ultimate family: first a partner, then kids. But the purpose of a romantic relationship isn’t about procreation, necessarily. Actually, the purpose of a romantic union is to provide support and bring out the best in each other, so that each individual has the nourishment and strength to go out in the world and reach the life goals that each individual has. Meanwhile, in bad relationships, the relationships actually drain both partners and hold them back from what they could otherwise be doing to advance themselves and to keep evolving as individuals.
