How To Discipline Children: 7 Tips for Christian Parents

Disciplining your children is an important aspect of parenting. There are many opinions about the right way to discipline your children so sometimes it is hard to know what is best for a Christian family. Even with the following suggestions, there are personal decisions you will have to make. I want to encourage you to follow God’s Word and His plan for raising a godly family and instilling proper character in your children.

God has given you the responsibility to raise your child. That responsibility does not belong to your child’s school — not even your church. It is your responsibility from God; therefore you should take the role of leader and authority with confidence knowing that it is God-ordained that you do so.

Start Early

You must start early with discipline. Waiting until your child is 14 is too late. Habits will have been formed long before then. Babies can quickly become great manipulators of their parents. The way you respond to your child’s manipulation as a baby sets the tone for the rest of your life together. If you wait until your child is 5 years old to start instilling discipline in them, then you have waited too long.

Your children need to learn to obey as soon as possible. They need to show a proper attitude in obedience as well. Ephesians 6:1, 2 says that children should obey and honor their parents. It is one thing to obey (do what they are told), but they also need to do it with honor. This is something they need to be taught early.

Realize Each Child is Unique

A child who never receives discipline in the home will have a harder time understanding and accepting their need of salvation.

Every child responds to discipline in different ways. My two children couldn’t be more different in personality and in the way they respond to correction. One is tender and thoughtful. There is rarely a time when they need to be told twice not to do something. The other child is forgetful to the point of forgetting that discipline hurts and they don’t really want to go through it again. This one continues to relive the same cycle until the pain sets in.

You cannot expect your children to respond the same way to correction; whether it is discipline by spanking or positive reinforcement. Realize they are different and correct them in a way that is appropriate to them. They still need discipline, but you may find they work better with a different form than your other children.

Be Consistent

The Bible says not to frustrate or provoke your children to wrath (Ephesians 6:4). This is done when a child has no idea what is expected of him. Most of us have been in situations at work or school when we are unsure what is expected of us. It is frustrating when the boss allows one behavior one day, but then says you will be disciplined the next day for the same actions. The lack of consistency is frustrating. Don’t do that to your child.

Children should know what is expected of them. They should know that mom and dad will behave the same way each time a punishable offense is done. Don’t frustrate (or provoke your children to wrath) by being inconsistent.

Apply the Rod of Correction

There are times when spanking is needed and appropriate. However, I will also concede that sometimes spanking is not appropriate. You should not spank your child when you are angry. You should spank them because it is right and necessary. If you cannot control yourself and spank appropriately then you need to understand that you lack personal self-discipline and need to ask the Lord to help you fix some character flaws in your own life.

When appropriate, and necessary, you should apply the rod of correction to your child in a consistent way. The Bible talks about using a rod which could also be a belt, wooden spoon or other appropriate paddle. I recommended that you use something other than your hand. Your children should think of their parents’ hands as something that is used for love and tenderness.

Read and study these Bible verses that will help you see what God says about physical discipline: Proverbs 13:24; Proverbs 22:15; Proverbs 23:13, 14; Proverbs 29:15; Hebrews 12:11

Stay Calm and in Control

Remember that you are the authority and that it is God-given authority that you have. You don’t need to lose control or yell at your child. Your authority has already been established by God. The only one you are trying to convince when you raise your voice is yourself. Accept the God-given responsibility to discipline your child and confidently administer the punishment necessary.

This is where starting early is important. If your child knows that you will call them 5 times to supper before you raise your voice or they get in trouble, then they won’t come until the 5^th time you yell at them. You have trained them to ignore you. You need to take control and teach them that when you say something, they need to obey. Besides starting early, you also need to be consistent as previously mentioned.

Godly Character is the Goal

God instituted the family to help us learn about Him. Children learn about God, the Heavenly Father, from their earthly father. It is so much easier for a child to understand their need of salvation when they have a good family unit and they understand consequences for their sin. A child who has been disciplined and understands the consequences of their wrong actions is a child who can easily (and early) understand that God will punish sin. A child who never receives discipline in the home will have a harder time understanding and accepting their need of salvation.

This family unit that God ordained teaches children to become productive members of society. They learn how to interact with others and how to behave around authority. These children are the ones whom the boss at work wants to promote because they can be trusted and are good workers. Godly character should be the goal of discipline; not just adherence to a list of rules.

Have a Positive Attitude Towards Discipline

Don’t dread discipline. Discipline is respectful to the child and the world they will grow up to impact. Being positive does not mean you need to look forward to every opportunity to spank your child that you can get, but that you will have a proper outlook for how important discipline is. It is like personal discipline. You may not look forward to going to the gym, walking around the block or pushing away from the table, but if you have the right attitude, you know that doing these things will have good repercussions in your life. It may not be fun at the moment, but the result is far more enjoyable (a well-behaved, godly child) than the alternative.

Building Tomorrow’s Leaders

Your actions today will help your child learn how to live properly around others. Maybe you are reading these discipline tips in regret that you did not start properly. You cannot change the past, but you can change the way you train your children now. Apologize to your children for not doing right by them and respecting them enough to train them. Then ask the Lord to help you while telling your children how things will be different in the future. You are training the next generation of leaders. Your children can grow up with godly character if you will take the time to instill it into them today.

Interested in more articles about children and parenting

Tale a look at these from our archives:

• 20 Important Bible Verses for Parents

• Bible Verses about Obedience

• 7 Tips for the Christian Father

Sources:
YouTube video: “Be Strong in the Lord” by Refuge of Sound Forth Singers & Orchestra of Bob Jones University

Tagged as: Children, discipline, discipline children, parents

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The Paradox of our Time in History - George Carlin

My cousin Peter had this on his Facebook. How could I not share this?

Wow, this becomes more true each day!

 

Isn't it amazing that George Carlin - comedian of the 70's and 80's - could write something so very eloquent...and so very appropriate.

A Message by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but ...shorter tempers, wider Freeways ,but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...
Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

If you don't share this with anyone....Who cares?
George Carlin

 

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You can't achieve your goals without discipline.

Source: 27.media.tumblr.com via Sarah on Pinterest

The Beauty of Discipline

My brother sent me in in an email. It had me from the first line, "I have to admit, I've always hated discipline." It was great to be reminded how important discipline is and how we need it in our lives.

	Pat's POV: February 2012
	The Beauty of Discipline I have to admit, I’ve always hated discipline. But at an early age my dad told me that discipline was key to success in life, and because I could see implicitly that he was right, I practiced discipline diligently in just about everything I undertook, from sports to school to work. Looking back I can’t deny that discipline was critical in everything I did well (as well as the culprit in everything that I didn’t do so well). I can say without doubt that my dad was right, that taking extra steps to do things the right way, again and again, really is key to success. But there was a problem. See, in my mind, the ultimate reward for years of discipline would be the arrival of the day when I could discard it. Someday, I promised myself, I would be successful enough to live a discipline-free life, to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. No two days would be the same, and no one would be able to expect anything of me that I didn’t feel like doing. That would, in fact, be the definition of success. I don’t think I’m terribly different from many entrepreneurs and leaders out there. Though we all understand the importance of hard work and diligence in meeting our daily responsibilities, many of us quietly yearn for the day when our businesses will be in a place where we can be spontaneous and free, where we can choose how to spend our time depending on what we feel like doing at any given moment, on any given day. Well, things don’t always turn out the way we think they will. For me there were two flaws in my thinking: First, when it comes to having a family, freedom and spontaneity are really rare. There always seems to be an appointment, a game, a recital or a family activity to attend when you’re a parent or a spouse. And on that day when there are no activities, there’s usually an illness or an unexpected emergency. But even if my home life was out of my control, I vowed to find a way to be discipline-free at work. That meant that whenever I wasn’t working with a client, writing a book or traveling to give a talk, I would free myself from time commitments and responsibilities that I didn’t enjoy. I would go to the office and bounce from one conversation to another based on whatever whims moved me that day or that hour. I would be as free from discipline as I had ever been in my life. Well, to a certain extent, I was able to achieve that goal. And that’s when the second flaw in my thinking became apparent: freedom from discipline left me feeling empty. Not only did my productivity diminish – which wasn’t a total shock – but something else happened that surprised me. I came to dread any activity, even relatively enjoyable ones, which prevented me from exercising “freedom.” I found that even though my days began with the promise of spontaneous creativity, they almost always ended with a sense of sluggish disappointment. I’d drive home feeling like a conscientious seventh grader who had spent his entire weekend playing video games. Aimless. Wasteful. A little ashamed. In a very limited way, I think I caught a glimpse of what it must be like for professional athletes and famous actors who, when they’re between projects or seasons, have so much freedom in their lives and still seem unhappy. There is just something ultimately lonely and unfulfilling about not having any clear responsibilities, even if those responsibilities aren’t exactly stimulating. And there is a point here for leaders and managers who, like me, often dread having to live more structured, disciplined lives than we think we want. After having indulged my life-long desire for freedom, I am now a reformed advocate of discipline, not just because it works, but because it has its own rewards. Don’t get me wrong. I still greatly appreciate and understand the need for occasional freedom and unstructured time. We all need that. But I have to admit that I didn’t realize that freedom becomes its own kind of prison without a general sense of structure and limits. By embracing the need for discipline in our lives, at work and at home, we receive a sense of peace and humility that is far better than freedom. And ironically, it makes occasional opportunities for freedom much more enjoyable. And so, I would like to take this opportunity to thank my wife and my children for filling my world with so many to-dos, which I probably never would have chosen for myself, thereby preventing me from the misery of too much freedom at home. And I’d like to apologize to my colleagues for tolerating my random interruptions during my prolonged period of adolescent rebellion. I guess it’s better to learn something at age 46 than never at all. Yours, Link to Vertical Response SaraHHouse365 | 10 Virtues of a Proverbs 31 Woman SaraHHouse365 | How to Discipline Children SaraHHouse365 | Discipline

Discipline

SUP?!

Today after a lazy afternoon at Tara's parents, I decided to head down to the dock and try out this somewhat new sport, SUP: Stand Up Paddleboarding.

I didn't do it long as I wasn't feeling anything that took extra effort plus I didn't feel real stable. I'm going to tackle it again in proper apparel and attitude. While I was walking back up, I was thinking of our lazy afternoon. We both admitted to eating like crap lately, hadn't exercised and felt unmotivated.

As I walked up those long stairs back up to the house, the simplicity of the lesson came to me: anything worth value requires discipline.
If you want a degree, you must go to college. This requires discipline to get up, go to class, study and get good grades. If you want a nice figure, you must discipline yourself to eat good food, say no to crap and cake, exercise. If you want a long lasting marriage, you must discipline yourself to stay true to your spouse. If you want money in the bank, discipline your spending.

As I got back to Tara in the house, I told her my thoughts. She replied:

"Duh, I have no discipline that's why I haven't accomplished anything."

I love this girl. She always makes me laugh!!